that strange new me.

so. i haven't worked out this week. as in: the way i usually do. there was that big, awesome, lovely run last sunday (that wrecked my knees), a gym session on tuesday and a swim on thursday, but that was that. had a tiny little cold thing on friday and saturday, so i did nothing but drinking fresh oj (that i didn't write down points for, it was medicine!) and ginger tea.

and i feel a bit more crappy than i expected to, actually. and it's not because of that tiny little cold thing. i miss working out. quite terribly, actually. this morning, when the flat was cleaned up and today's cake prepared (baking frenzy, i tell you), and there was nothing left to do but head back to bed to read (superlong day because of daylight savings and all, plus the bf was away for the night for a wedding) i was thiiiiis close to putting on my running gear and trying a run. i didn't though. because my poor knees? they hurt when walking up stairs yesterday. and even if today's run would have been do-able, pain-wise, i am dead scared of hurting them more right now. had to mark three scheduled runs on the plan that is stuck to my fridge as not-run today, too. super-sad.

i have, however, already packed my gym bag to take to work tomorrow. because no matter what the ortho doc tells me tomorrow morning, there will be a gym work out tomorrow night. the intensity and kind of which is yet to be determined, obviously.

i am so happy that i love working out these days, that i positively long for it. it makes me feel so very good, inside and out. i just hope my knees start cooperating again. i'm willing to give them everything they want, really: new shoes, orthotics, quality time with physio chris. they can have it all, really. it's two weeks till that 10k that i've signed up (and paid for). and right now, i'm not expecting to be able to run it. boo.

but one step at a time: first: ortho visit. sadness or fear (if i should be allowed to run, that is) about that 10k: tomorrow. and working out. oh yes. :)