denial & perfection.

there's one little thing has been bugging me in the weightloss/health/fitness/foodie-blogsphere, and it's something that pretty much all meal-pic-bloggers do, especially in relation to yummy and/or slightly indulgent food:

• "i shared half of that..."
• "i had a sip of wine..."
• "i just had a taste of each..."
• "i had half of a slice...and it was super-filling"
• "i had a third of a waffle with..."

sure, it's just giving amounts of food consumed, but to me (and i am probably super-sensitive here) these supercommon sentences read like justifications. for stuff that - at least in my opinion - doesn't need to be justified.

i thought about this during yesterdays' run, and i guess i have a pretty good idea why exactly this is bothering me:

• because i wonder whether these gals are really full after the little food they photograph (i would not be satisfied by about 75% of meals i see pics of - my portions are so much larger);
• because some meal-pic-blogs seem oh-so-very perfect nutritionwise (hardly any meals on the run, no late-night-snacks, no cravings, no full-servings of anything, hardly ever any seconds), and my life? is far from perfect; and lastly
• because i really don't want to believe that maintaining my weight loss will contain as much denial as these meals.

i enjoy reading all of the blogs on my blogroll, including the meal-pic-bloggers. otherwise, i would not read them, obviously. i get tons of great food and meal ideas, discover new ingredients, whatnot, but i'm wondering whether reading them is good for me in the long run.

right now, i am (for whatever reason) pretty sensitive when it comes to that perfection-stuff. i firmly believe that perfection is not possible. i actually make an effort to not strive for perfection. because wanting to attain perfection just doesn't work for me. if i set out to be perfect, i will inevitably fail. because life happens. pizzas happens. sometimes i will not make it to the gym for whatever reason. and i don't want to risk throwing my whole healthier lifestyle overboard just because i didn't do it perfectly. because that's what i did in the past. back when it didn't work, that weight-loss thing.

i want to do my best, yes, and eat healthily and work out. but i also want to have fun doing so. and have full servings. at least every once in a while.

[edited to add: not writing this to hate. not writing this to critise any one person in particular. just writing this to help me figure out where i am with my head, right now, trying to establish whatever will be my new normal. and i firmly believe this: whatever works you is awesome. and whatever works for me is awesome. it just doesn't have to be the same thing.]